in omnia paratus
'Who are you?' said the Caterpillar.

This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation. Alice replied, rather shyly, 'I — I hardly know, sir, just at present — at least I know who I was when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then.'

'What do you mean by that?' said the Caterpillar sternly. 'Explain yourself!'

'I can't explain myself, I'm afraid, sir' said Alice, 'because I'm not myself, you see.'

I loved him. I’m not going to say he was the love of my life or anything.
But I loved him.
I can’t sleep.
How will I ever sleep again?
It’s so hard to be alone with myself.
But when I’m not alone, all I want to do is be alone.
I wish I was heartless.
A cold, unfeeling bitch.
I don’t care about any of this.
I’m unmoved. Nonchalant.
Heartbroken? Not me. No way.
Never.
I don’t want to cry.
I don’t want to laugh.
I don’t want to think or feel.
Nothing means anything.
Life is temporary. Nothing matters.
Emotionless.
I wish. 

RIP